What kind of world are we living in? I’ll tell you, we’re living in the kind of world where someone walks into a store & asks the customer service associate at the door if it’s ok to bring his ice-cream into the store but not if his German Shepard can enter. What’s even crazier, is that both were fine. That is the new standard. Bullshit is the new standard. A non working and undeserving “thing” incapable of speech, let alone accomplishment has as much right as I do to be in places made for and by humans. I’m sick of it, really — keep your dogs in a dogs place!! Buying your dog a stroller, and clothes does not a REAL baby make. Therefore if this is your child and that’s your belief, maybe you should go live in a pound with dogs, than subjecting others to your reality.
We’re living in the kind of world where people differentiate the level of their requests as if a) it is actually so or b) to make it seem less than it is (not even sure how the hell one arrives there) i.e. can you do me a small favor? Can you do me a quick favor? Can I ask something small of you? WTF! Who determines what is big or small? We may see that differently, what’s small to you may be big to me and vice versa. Then there are people like me, an ask is an ask…so just ask. It may seem small for you to ask me to watch your kid(s) for the weekend but to me it might be big. So don’t preface with sizing, because it’s relative and moreover irrelevant…just ask…you need something & obviously believe that I can help you — so just fucking ask.
I’ll tell you what kind of world we’re living in…the person on line behind you, sees that there is a long line and at least 5 minutes before it’s your turn (since you happen to be in front of them) when you turn to grab a juice while still quasi maintaining your position that same person BEHIND you attempts to move ahead of you and not just that…when you say “I’m actually on line and have been for 10 minutes, I was here before you got here, that’s how come I’m in line in FRONT of you — go fucking figure”!! You are now the hostile one. When I’m not…the person lacking the basics like respect, regard, recognition, consideration, common sense and a plain old modicum of fairness is the problem. Had that person not tried me, we wouldn’t have a situation. This similarly applies to driving too! People just need to calm down. Stay in your lane, literally because everyone doesn’t have your tolerance level for bullshit.
I’m sick of all you “quiet ones” who in your quest (conscious or not) to be considered nice and easy going “let shit slide”. If you checked a motherfucker every now & then, I might not have to! But most important, they might never do that shit again (what a gift to the world that would be).
Or how about the guy on the airplane who moves your bag over carelessly & aggressively so his ” barely can fit, big ass stuffed to the brim bag” can. As if, his shit is more precious, and more important (and it is in his world hence having led to his actions). And when you say “that’s my bag, *handle it better” or “those are my things & I actually care about them, so if you can, stuff your shit into another overhead. Or how about an even better idea, how about next time you just pack accordingly. But since you fail to follow guidelines, I now have to be subjected to your bullshit?” We’re living in a world that when I say this, I’m wrong. That’s the bullshit I’m sick of. Man, if you didn’t touch my shit to begin with, you’d continue to go unnoticed. Just don’t touch my shit, seriously…because here comes a shocker — I’d rather not notice you.
*Passive people often times add in “soft” words in scenarios like this to seem less harsh or less “something”. When its actually stupid to do so. Its an oxymoron to tell someone that you have a problem using nice words. Why do people feel the need to do so? If you’ve been taught that and if you feel like it makes a difference, go-ahead and add a please…”please don’t throw my bag to the side”. But why do I have to ask you to “please” not do that?? How about you just don’t do it. Then neither of us will have to say shit to each other about anything. That’s what I want, I want to not to have to say anything to you, ever. That’s right, I want us to talk about nothing & if we’re talking about nothing then we’re not speaking. You’re blissfully in your world existing just fine & so am I. But in the kind of world we’re living in people pussyfoot around matters because they don’t want to subject themselves or the other person doing them wrong to discomfort. That’s twisted to me, simply twisted. And I’m fine with being confrontational if it leads to correction.
We’re living in the kind of world where you can’t tell people when they or their requests are unreasonable. When by definition the word wouldn’t exist if it couldn’t be used when applicable. I feel like if you cross paths with 20 people in a day and 18 or 19 of them “let you live” expect that 1 or 2 won’t. Statistically you’re doing fantastic, but no…people want 20 out of 20 to have acquiesced to them somehow throughout their day to daying. Maybe, just maybe…those 18 or 19 people are the same model & make as you, “the rule”…and maybe you’re all fucked up for expecting “the exception”* to be just like you. How skewed of a view is it for one to expect all interactions on any given day to go “smooth”? Or that interactions with certain people should go smooth simply because of your relationship/kinship? According to me, this is sadly the new standard, Warped and Distorted.
And there isn’t always something to say. There isn’t always a reply that should come. There is a certain knowing in silence, and that doesn’t mean you don’t say what needs to be said…it means if circumstantially you are in a position that dictates you say something — say it but understand that a response doesn’t have to come. You just want one because it makes you feel better. Makes you feel like you didn’t put off someone too terribly. Person 1: I appreciate you picking me up…I hope it doesn’t take you that long to get back home. Person 2: no problem. When in actuality person 1 knows it’s out of person 2’s way & person 2 oft times** really feels put out of their way, but doesn’t say that because of the nature of the relationship (see blog on civility) and or because they are passive. Another scenario, Person 1: I apologize for (list injury & slights you’ve heard or expressed)… Person 2: a) I forgive you, it’s ok; b) no it’s cool, no biggie.
Hello? There doesn’t have to be a response here. If you feel like you did something to me that warrants an apology, then apologize but don’t expect that I have to act or be nice about it. Don’t expect that I even have to acknowledge it. Remember, you did something to me, don’t now make this about me needing to respond just because that’s what people are supposed to do. What people are actually supposed to do, is not do shit that requires an apology to begin with. That’s what I want from you. I don’t need another sorry, I have a closet full! (for Colored Girls…Ntzoke Shange). Don’t injure me and tell me how I should deal with said injury (BIG or SMALL). Keep your “I just was” and hold your “its just a”, reserve your “justs”. You cannot do something to someone else and say what it just is…only I can say “it’s just a black eye”. Or it’s just $350 that I loaned you. You cannot say, she “just” loaned me $350. And we’re using just contextually/interchangeably because what people also “mean” to say is “only”…i.e. It’s only $350; It’s only a dress; I only meant to say; I’ve only been late 4 times. What most people don’t get, is that 1 is too many. If you mistreat me 1 time, that was 1 too many. Get it? Therefore, I am the person who gets to say what it “just” or “only” was. Maybe you’re ok with being bullied by others, but I’m not to be pushed around cause I do come out swinging.
If ever you get an apology from me…you deserve it, I had to be set tripping and glory be to God*** (apropos). Because I really, really, strive daily to live with a level of stark self awareness where it’s my aim to not ever put others or myself in an uncomfortable place requiring “forgiveness”. And that’s both the doling out of and receiving of. And frankly, I only want to deal with people who are like me.
Just because someone gives you a response doesn’t mean it’s the truth. It doesn’t mean that they’re not that upset if they respond. People like lies and the act of being lied to…and that’s why so many are lying and why so many are being lied to. Person 1: Hey, did I hurt your feelings? Person 2: not really, it’s ok. Pat yourselves on the back for being fake. Standing ovation for being a cheap knock off of your real self; Round of applause for not honoring and demanding and asking for the standard you really want. ~Psssst…You are part of the problem~ And don’t be mad at me for being who I am and who you fail to be.
*We all need the extension of grace & we also offer it, however it should be the exception, not the standard that you’re always asking & expecting someone’s pardon for.
**I’m human and do shit too, but I’m willing to bet…not as often as you. Remember I’m an exception to the rule.
***Not indicative of my beliefs, just a fitting statement.
As always, until next time…Act like you know!