The mystery of humans…

We, none of us have the answers.  As much as we may have figured out certain things, there are just some other things we haven’t (and may never). 

The conundrum I find most fascinating is doing something you wouldn’t ordinarily do (or that you claim you wouldn’t).  Perhaps even doing something “wrong”.  The compulsion of thoughts leading to an act or repeated actions that fit either of those 2 categories.

What I do know is that we each have to figure out our own shit without the input and influence of others.  You know why? Because others have their own shit to figure out and really can’t begin to tell others how they should handle anything.  Of course that isn’t to say that if you have relevant experience in a particular area that you don’t share those gems, by all means do so while fully understanding that your goal is only to impart wisdom or add value, not force other people to do or see things your way (after all it may have only worked for you). 

I am intrigued by these 2 things: 
1. This notion of moth to a flame.  “Like a moth to a flame” is an old saying that is used as an analogy to describe how one person is attracted to another person — drawn to them — like a moth is drawn to the light and heat of an open flame.  {This precede’s being burned}. :0)

2. Or that of deer caught in headlights.  It is an expression that means that you are too stunned to move.  In other words you are terrified.  It comes from when you catch a deer in your headlights and they just freeze. {Usually right before you hit em}! :0)

Maybe we (humans) are no better than these animals we regard as foolish.  Just dumb for no reason other than the sake of stupidity.  Maybe just maybe what we are supposed to do is give in to the light and get burned or stay stuck, eyes big & wide waiting to get struck down.  Life’s perpetual cycle of lessons becomes quite tiring, especially given that it is usually tied to pain or some form of discomfort.  Lessons don’t typically “feel” good.  Granted and thankfully some are easier to come by; to get; to learn; and or experience/go through.

I’m feeling like this stuff mightttt (big might) border on some form of eternal optimism, which lives inside many of us, no matter how big or small.  Some of us carry with us a hope, a yearning, a desire that maybe this is different.  You know why?  Because it might be & then there are those who conversely believe more in the probability of…and who may take a pessimistic position, only an individual can say/determine for him/herself the path he/she must/will take.

I’ve heard (as an exploratory concept), that people are attracted to pain…hence the various levels of self sabotage we engage in–affecting our lives and unfortunately those of others, often times beyond repair.  Manifesting cycles of our own woundedness, and like moths to a flame being constantly lured by something we can’t quite explain. 

A myriad of songs explore this very topic, with lines like “if loving you is wrong then I don’t wanna be right”.  I won’t even list out the countless sentiments similar to that…it is this weak admittance of one’s inability to resist something* bad for ya as if that’s ok. 

Sometimes it’s easier to determine when the stakes are too high if money is involved.  The big question is how can you tell when it’s your heart (before you get burned or struck the hell down)?

Schemain, an acquired taste~


About fanciesherself

Schemain Duncan is an American grown, Brooklyn bred intellectually gifted Writer, Wordsmith and Life Coach currently residing in Atlanta. She writes a provocative and controversial blog from the atypical new woman’s perspective about the subliminal and subversive memes that infiltrate & affect the dynamics between Black men and Black women, inclusive of other interracial issues with hopes that her raw, sharp edged words will create dialogue and help to shift perspectives. Digest at your leisure~ Her way with words has found another creative outlet with a unique greeting card line aptly called “Honestly Speaking” which captures what others don't and that says what you are really feeling and seeking to communicate in all of the "in between" moments. All photography are original works, see both by visiting...
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One Response to The mystery of humans…

  1. babsie says:


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